Difference between revisions of "Wordsmithing"

From Gender and Tech Resources

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m (→‎Jump on the emo bandwagon!)
 
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Let grammar, syntax, semantics, punctuation, and spelling into your life! Even the most energetic and wonderful mess has to be turned into sentences...
 
Let grammar, syntax, semantics, punctuation, and spelling into your life! Even the most energetic and wonderful mess has to be turned into sentences...
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[[File:Virus.jpg|480px|thumb|right]]
 
[[File:Virus.jpg|480px|thumb|right]]
  
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Note: Make that singular, ''take back the word'', and expect trolls believing religiously in ''the word'' (whatever the word is).
 
Note: Make that singular, ''take back the word'', and expect trolls believing religiously in ''the word'' (whatever the word is).
  
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== Creating a fake press release ==
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=== Predicates and implication by intonation ===
  
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For press releases the entertainment relies on it being accepted as a real press release by news outlets, IOW in how convincing it is. Study a few real press releases.
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From Are Your Lights On?: How to Figure Out What the Problem Really is https://www.smashwords.com/extreader/read/53704/1/are-your-lights-on:
  
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* ''Mary'' had a little lamb
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* Mary ''had'' a little lamb
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* Mary had ''a'' little lamb
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* Mary had a ''little'' lamb
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* Mary had a little ''lamb''
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=== Where did words start? ===
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Goodun. We have the written word, preceded by spoken word. And apparently the origin of spoken language has stumped linguistics. While some write things like ''"While it is widely understood that our ability to communicate through speech sets us apart from other animals, language experts, historians and scientists can only hypothesize how, where and when it all began. Some new findings may provide some real insight into this conundrum"'' <ref>Where and when did language begin? A remarkable new study may have the answer http://blog.dictionary.com/origin/</ref>, others not using the same definition of "language" and using more fluid perceptions might say that that is not "widely understood" but more a case of "widely hypothesised" <ref>Which language is the oldest? http://www.languagesoftheworld.info/historical-linguistics/which-language-is-the-oldest.html</ref> and that clearly, animal people, plant people and rock people also communicate <ref>Ainimal communication https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animal_communication</ref><ref>Plants talk to each other using an internet of fungus http://www.bbc.com/earth/story/20141111-plants-have-a-hidden-internet and https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20827864.600-fungal-threads-are-the-internet-of-the-plant-world/</ref><ref>Mycorrhiza-Induced Resistance and Priming of Plant Defenses http://www.researchgate.net/publication/225059105_Mycorrhiza-Induced_Resistance_and_Priming_of_Plant_Defenses</ref>, some even seem to "talk".
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If someone asks the more fluid "when did the spoken words start?", these people might reply that ''spoken word'' started with communication by making sound waves <ref>Can any animals talk and use language like humans http://www.bbc.com/earth/story/20150216-can-any-animals-talk-like-humans</ref>. If then someone asks when and where communication started, they might communicate they think it started with chemistry <ref>Animal Behavior: Signaling and Communication http://www.sparknotes.com/biology/animalbehavior/signalingandcommunication/section2.rhtml</ref> and it appears just as true for humans <ref>Neurobiology of Chemical Communication Chapter 19 Human Pheromones http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK200980/</ref><ref>Chemical communication and mother-infant recognition http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2717541/</ref>.
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And some when presented with that question, will not reply because they do not understand the question because they speak another language. Or they may reply (possibly asking "what?") and we may or may not understand the reply because we do not speak their language. We haven't built those "receptors" and "embedded structures" (yet).
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Words account for only 5%? <ref>Communication: 80% Body Language; 15% Tone & 5% Actual Words http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021960187</ref> Really?!? <ref>Is Nonverbal Communication a Numbers Game? Is body language really over 90% of how we communicate? https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/beyond-words/201109/is-nonverbal-communication-numbers-game</ref>
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=== The last word ===
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Some people seem to need to have it. Sometimes they are argumentative, but often they simply will not let a chat end for whatever reason. Enough is enough!
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''have the final/last word '':
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# to say the last statement in a discussion or argument: ''He can't bear to lose an argument. He always has to have the last word. That's why he's so annoyed with other people wanting to have the last word too.''
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# to make the final decision about something (usually + on ) ''Our bus driver has the final word on turning the wheel and pushing and pulling all kinds of levers and pedals in the bus.  Do NOT interfere.''
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For expanding the universe of possible solutions, we need to understand the "for whatever reason". It can be:
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* know-it-all
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* dense
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* stubborn
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* intoxicated
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* always needing to be right
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* conversation hogging
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* excited
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* consensus-driven
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In short, the last word has no value in itself. No need for battles. Or?
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=== Looking for universality? ===
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Try emotions.
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=== Jump on the emo bandwagon! ===
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Are emoji the same thing as emoticons?
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Answer 1: For all intents and purposes, yes they are.
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Answer 2: ''Emoticons (from “emotion” plus “icon”) are specifically intended to depict facial expression or body posture as a way of conveying emotion or attitude in e-mail and text messages. They originated as ASCII character combinations such as :-) to indicate a smile—and by extension, a joke—and :-( to indicate a frown. In East Asia, a number of more elaborate sequences have been developed, such as (")(-_-)(") showing an upset face with hands raised. Over time, many systems began replacing such sequences with images, and also began providing ways to input emoticon images directly, such as a menu or palette. The emoji sets used by Japanese cell phone carriers contain a large number of characters for emoticon images, along with many other non-emoticon emoji.''
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Don't get me started on dingbats.
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To jump the bandwagon, first of all, keep calm and keep fiddling.  Keep your towel close, and your IronyGuard at hand <ref>IRONYGuard - Removes All The Painful Irony In Your News https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BFPdnIwP-kw</ref>. Then, jump the wagon.
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[[File:fiddling.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Keep calm & Keep on fiddling]]
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* Too fast. Before jumping, you should have informed yourself properly with the documentary: http://www.dissolve.com/showreels/emoji After allowing four scripts I still wasn't able to see it. It seems to be riding that magic carpet in the cloud.
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* Inside information:  If you wish to obfuscate your emoticon traffic, use hearts. Hearts are among the most used emoticons.
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* For unpredictable emoji traffic get the newest of the newest. The Unicode Consortium regularly releases new innovations in emoticons. Visit emojipedia for more on that: http://emojipedia.org/new/
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* Turn tracking on for (adjustments in) decision-making on your obfuscation/unpredictability ratio: http://www.emojitracker.com/ After allowing six! scripts I still get nothing.
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* Social media:  The first one (http://emoj.li/) was already closed but, don't weep, Emojicate is available now for iOS devices (https://itunes.apple.com/en/app/emojicate-emoji-only-chat/id902547983). Simply switch device and your happiness is right around the corner again!
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* Do It Yourself: Turn your selfies, pets and favourite celebrities into emojis. The about page states "We believe in your freedom of expression". Download the app NOW from http://www.imojiapp.com/about
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=== Read This! ===
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(゜゜)～ employs the finite ~>゜)～～～ analysis method to (..) (._.) physical ( ..)φメモメモ φ(..)メモメモ of a =^_^=. The (V)o￥o(V) process consists of .....φ(・∀・＊) all systems into individual ((d[-_-]b)) or "＼(◎o◎)／" whose (-_-)zzz is easily //0-0\\ and then reconstructing the #-) from these o/\o. This is a O_o way of performing ┐('～`；)┌ and even in other（´∀｀）, such as ( ﾟヮﾟ). For example, ｷﾀﾜァ*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･゜(n‘∀‘)ηﾟ･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･* !!!!!
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== man rtfm ==
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[[File:RTFM.jpg|500px|thumb|right]]
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For a recombination like this there is no need to make it convincing as a real man page, and the entertainment relies on making fun of overly reduced (context-less) statements and overly structured manual pages.
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'''NAME'''
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RTFM – tool to stimulate learning and improve workflow.
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'''SYNOPSIS'''
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RTFM is used to hit others with a lightning bolt.
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'''DESCRIPTION'''
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RTFM refers to the manual pages (or “man” pages, after the command used to display them) contained in *nix variants and has mutated to refer to reading any help pages or FAQs.
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We lament over and over about how no one reads anymore, but we are also often just as guilty. Victims of our own hubris and overconfidence. In our own minds, we’re somehow annoyed by the very job we are doing. Help people solve problems. But sometimes it just touches the nerve, especially in situations where you’ve already explained how to fix it, and even more especially when you’ve already explained how to fix it to the same person.
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It’s a slippery slope. Of course you always want to help, but at the same time, if you’re always there and available, it will lead to a condition where the user/junior admin will always skip figuring things out for themselves and just come straight to you.
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There is no shame in reading. However, roughly 75% of IT is comprised of men. And it’s a pretty common perception that men don’t read (or ask for) directions.
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''noun vs verb''
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While the word “read” is a verb, the entire acronym is often used as a verb as well. Ex:
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How do I set up pf to do ALTQ?
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Dumbass, man it.
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omg, *cry*
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You’re lucky all I did was RTFM you.
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*Theo sets mode : +b *!n00b@*
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A common alternative to RTFM is to stop using Linux and move out of your parents’ basement.
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Some critics assert that frequent users of the term are simply expressing elitism against the newcomers, thus driving them away without providing any tips or helpful suggestions. This is especially true when RTFM is used without even specifying which manual their correspondent should be reading. In the absence of a manual, one may be advised to Lurk Moar, see lurkmoar(8)
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'''FILES'''
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In its normal application RTFM uses no files and is words spoken (or written) only. If applied via email may contain a link to the manual in the environment and the odd meme image. Such meme images are also in use on twitter ever since the update_with_media function was added to the twitter API. If applied on a forum, many users and files may be affected; see butthurt(8).
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http://readthefuckingmanual.com/
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http://www.pophangover.com/4641/the-official-internet-butthurt-complaint-form/
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https://duckduckgo.com/?q=writing+effective+manuals
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'''ENVIRONMENT VARIABLES'''
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Manual
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'''SEE ALSO'''
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lurkmoar(8), butthurt(8), tldr(8)
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'''BUGS'''
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You may be required to look things up and be able to fix things your self eventually.
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'''EXAMPLES'''
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It’s 10:30AM. The black themed firefox browser is about to stare back as a ping announces an incoming message over jabber to our fearless gurl.
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“Hey! Sorry to bother you, but how do I …”
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Our fearless gurl’s eyes roll deep into the back of her eye sockets as she emits a loud, exasperated sigh. She knows it’s in the manual – she helped write it. But no one seems to read it. She feels her efforts have been wasted.
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But today, our fearless gurl has a plan. Through the miracles of modern science and some quick searches online, she has found a secret formula that would merge her mind into anyone that emails or tweets or pokes over jabber to ask questions. They would be under her control and would instantly think to look for the answers themselves. All she needs is a bolt of lightning to complete the transformation … the surrounding environment is already crackling …
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“RTFM !!!!!”, she said.
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'''RESTRICTIONS'''
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Authoritarians and exceptionalists considering themselves very important and too high up to ever having to lift a finger may take a dim view of overenthusiastic application of this tool.
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'''AUTHOR'''
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While overcoming the RTFM syndrome remains a mystery, this man page was assembled from various sources by anonymii. She disclaims responsibility for any actions inspired by this man page.
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'''HISTORY'''
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Although largely unsubstantiated, usage of RTFM may have begun as a military lingo during World War II, when the phrase “Read The Field Manual” became a staple expression among American soldiers in response to basic questions asked by new enlistees. First introduced in 1939, US Army Field Manuals instructed all the vital, necessary skills for a soldier, from how to fold your clothes properly to how to toss a grenade inside the enemy’s tank. By the early 1950s the phrase RTFM was in common use by radio and radar technicians in the US Armed Forces. Operators frequently did not check for simple faults before asking questions; for example, checking whether a power switch was on, a fuse had blown or a power cord had become disconnected. A common response would be, “Did you check the oh en oh ef ef switch (On/Off). RTFM appeared in print in 1979 on the Table of Contents page of the LINPACK Users’ Guide in the form “R.T.F.M.” — Anonymous, suggesting that it was already well established. Cleve Moler has since revealed that a visit to Argonne National Laboratory by Tektronix Software Manager Ned Thanhouser (grandson of Edwin Thanhouser) during the development of MATLAB led to the anonymous quote. The first Urban Dictionary entry for RTFM was submitted on November 13th, 2003, although its usage has been documented in Slashdot comments as early as in March 1999. Just yonder, Manual was struggling to make his way through the foxy forest behind Fucking’s place. Manual had severely hurt his love handle during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral Manuals suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the The. One by one they latched on to Manual. Already weakened from his injury, Manual yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Manuals running off with his The. But then God came down with His charismatic smile and restored Manual’s The. Feeling pleased, God smote the Manuals for their injustice. Then He got in His best-in-its-so-called-‘class’ sedan and jetted away with the fortitude of half a million man-eating capybaras running from a oversized pack of 3-legged wallabies. Manual danced with joy when he saw this. His The was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in four minutes his favorite TV show, Fucking, was going to come on (followed immediately by ‘When 3-legged wallabies meet hand grenade’). Manual was excited. And so, everyone except Fucking and a few rusty razor blade-toting long-haired sea monkeys lived blissfully happy, forever after.
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'''ANTITHESIS'''
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The antithesis of RTFM is TL;DR which stands for “too long; didn’t read.”, see tldr(8)
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If some asshole presents to you a long text and you still need to read it, you can incrementally read it with SuperMemo. What this entails is you mince and flashcardize the shit out of the text until it gets obliterated and you can’t recognize it. It’s like throwing the piece of e-paper in acid. The TL;DR is no moar.
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'''FUTURE DIRECTIONS'''
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None or a new type of hominids in around 5 million years (or sooner by self-destruction).
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'''SEE ALSO'''
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STFW (“Search The Fucking Web”), GIYF (“Google Is Your Friend”), LMGTFY (“Let Me Google That For You”), RTBM (“Read The Bloody Manual”—In some countries, e.g., the UK and Australia, this is a fractionally more polite alternative with identical meaning), RTFA (“Read The Fucking/Featured Article”—common on news forums such as Fark.com and Slashdot, where using “TFA” instead of “the article” has become a meme). Also see [[#Palindromes|palindrome]] and [[#Underminers|underminers]] resources below.
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== Creating a fake press release ==
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For press releases the entertainment relies on it (at least initially) being accepted as a civilised press release by receivers, IOW in how convincing it looks at first glance. Study a few local real press releases.
 
=== Anatomy of a press release ===
 
=== Anatomy of a press release ===
 
Keep it to one page (400-600 words):
 
Keep it to one page (400-600 words):
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* '''Logo''': Often found on releases distributed via mail, e-mail or a newswire service. Otherwise, omit.
 
* '''Logo''': Often found on releases distributed via mail, e-mail or a newswire service. Otherwise, omit.
 
* '''Headline''': Usually designed to be short and grab attention.  
 
* '''Headline''': Usually designed to be short and grab attention.  
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* '''Boilerplate''': Organisational who and what.
 
* '''Boilerplate''': Organisational who and what.
 
* '''Contact information''': Newswire requirement.
 
* '''Contact information''': Newswire requirement.
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* '''End mark''': ### or -end-.
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* '''End mark''': ### or -end- (newswire)
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=== Sperm are Dying! Females to Outnumber Males! ===
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Amsterdam, 26 august 2015, GP
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[[File:Triangle-of-power.jpg|480px|thumb|right|Undermining the Machine part 2 http://underminers.org/the-book/chapter-7/chapter-7-part-2/, may be freely reproduced but not altered]]
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We may already be seeing the initial impact on men of rising temperatures and if this rise continues, sperm may fail completely. Will there be only females walking around on this planet? Does this spell the end of humans?
  
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== Creating a fake man page ==
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The seemingly most likely explanation for scrotal descent, and one that has been around for some time, is that sperm production and storage are maximised at typically 2.5 to 3 <sup>o</sup>C below the average healthy human body temperature of 37 <sup>o</sup>C. Supporting phenomena to that theory are skin of the scrotal sac being thin (promoting heat dissipation), and arteries supplying blood to the scrotum being located next to the veins that are taking blood away from it (one can easily recognise a cooling/heating exchange mechanism happening right there). Plus that spermatogenesis is most efficient at 34 <sup>o</sup>C. If sperm were kept at normal body temperature, sperm production would fail completely.
  
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For a recombination like this there is no need to make it convincing as a real man page, and the entertainment relies on making fun of overly reduced (contextless) statements and overly structured manual pages.
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As temperatures rise (sperm with a Y survives three days, with an X five days, and higher temperatures slow down sperm) women may birth more girls than boys. If this were true, one would expect slightly more women conceived in tropical regions than at the poles (in historical records). This indeed appears to be the case <ref>Hot male: can sex in humans be modified by temperature? http://aerg.canberra.edu.au/library/sex_general/2003_McLachlan_Storey_TSD_in_humans.pdf</ref>. In Japan, rising temperatures are reported to have lead to a higher proportion of girls being born than boys, suggesting that climate change could indeed alter the mix of men and women <ref>Climate change is associated with male:female ratios of fetal deaths and newborn infants in Japan http://www.fertstert.org/article/S0015-0282%2814%2901840-8/abstract</ref>.
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With the current rise in temperature we'd also expect to see a decline of male populations in other species. This too has been found. Male turtle populations are apparently already crashing in the heat <ref>Male turtle populations crashing in the heat https://www.newscientist.com/article/dn11227-male-turtle-populations-crashing-in-the-heat/</ref>.
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Male turtles may be saved by female turtles digging deeper (hence cooler) birth pits on beaches, but with a direct threat to human balls, the chances of survival of just about every species on this planet went up as the powers-that-claim-to-be, as mired in self-interest as they are <ref>How the rich are destroying the earth http://makewealthhistory.org/2009/06/02/how-the-rich-are-destroying-the-earth-by-herve-kempf/</ref>, may take causes of rising temperatures more seriously as a threat to respond to with impeccable  interdependent non-delusional energy dancing <ref>ZooKeys biodiversity research http://zookeys.pensoft.net/browse_articles (beautiful pictures of newly discovered species)</ref><ref>So you say you don't want a revolution? http://cluborlov.blogspot.nl/2015/07/so-you-say-you-dont-want-revolution.html (with some great comments too!)</ref><ref>The Logic of Nonviolent Revolutions http://privatewww.essex.ac.uk/~ksg/nvd2012/Dahletal.pdf</ref>, than as an opportunity for cap-and-trade on CO<sub>2</sub> (or shifted to other types of) emissions ("regulating" farting) and continuing Business As Usual <ref>Can Christiana Figueres persuade humanity to save itself? http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2015/08/24/the-weight-of-the-world (most likely not, as the attempt seems to assume economic growth & emissions can be uncoupled)</ref><ref>Fossil Fuel Execs Made Twice As Much As U.S. Pledged To Help Fight Climate Change Overseas http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/fossil-fuel-execs-climate-change_55e62913e4b0b7a9633ac41a</ref>, because their own gonads may be next.
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'''About GenderSec Press''': ''GenderSec Press is a one-time only but really non-existent organisation, called into being for making this press release look fake.''
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=== Smarter Cities ===
  
 
== Resources ==
 
== Resources ==
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* Postmodern Parody In The Discworld Novels of Terry Pratchett http://www.lspace.org/books/analysis/christopher-bryant.html
 
* Postmodern Parody In The Discworld Novels of Terry Pratchett http://www.lspace.org/books/analysis/christopher-bryant.html
 
* Blott on the landscape https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3TUU6313Xs&list=PLrIZy_2-uULPh7bbNxCwBVqz2_OyWVAKh
 
* Blott on the landscape https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3TUU6313Xs&list=PLrIZy_2-uULPh7bbNxCwBVqz2_OyWVAKh
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* Totalism http://totalism.org/
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* Mind-blowing secrets of NSA's security exploit stockpile revealed at last http://www.theregister.co.uk/2015/09/04/nsa_explains_handling_zerodays/
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=== Changing perceptions ===
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* Mystery surrounds hallucinatory chaos at German homeopathy conference http://www.theguardian.com/science/2015/sep/10/homeopathy-conference-in-germany-goes-awry-as-delegates-take-lsd-like-drug
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* The Net (documentary) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLqrVCi3l6E and https://brianholmes.wordpress.com/2008/10/13/filming-the-world-laboratory/
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=== Sound waves ===
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* The Scream (Change the world without taking power), John Holloway https://libcom.org/library/change-world-without-taking-power-john-holloway
  
 
=== Inflationary language ===
 
=== Inflationary language ===
 
* And punctuation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcGA4alhPas
 
* And punctuation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcGA4alhPas
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=== Palindromes ===
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* A Chronotope of Revolution: The Palindrome from the Perspective of Cultural Semiotics http://www.realchange.org/pal/semiotic.htm
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* Evolutionary history of novel genes on the tammar wallaby Y chromosome: Implications for sex chromosome evolution http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3290785/
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* Lost Y Chromosome Genes Found on Autosomes http://www.the-scientist.com/?articles.view/articleNo/43078/title/Lost-Y-Chromosome-Genes-Found-on-Autosomes/ (WTF? mentioning Old World monkeys, New World monkeys, and apes :D)
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* Male Bullshit Stories: Porn (Part V) https://trustyourperceptions.wordpress.com/ (And I know a lot of men who do not take pleasure in hurting women and animals. KEEP MEN LIKE THAT!!!!! and do not take the abusive kind seriously. AT ALL!!!!! See [[#Underminers|underminers]] resources Chapter 9))
  
 
=== Other times ===
 
=== Other times ===
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* Scripts of the Ancient World http://www.ancientscripts.com
 
* Scripts of the Ancient World http://www.ancientscripts.com
 
* Unifon Alphabet http://www.omniglot.com/writing/unifon.htm
 
* Unifon Alphabet http://www.omniglot.com/writing/unifon.htm
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* Click away http://www.languagesoftheworld.info/phonetics-and-phonology/click-away.html
 
* Snow Flower and the Secret Fan http://www.lisasee.com/snow-flower-and-the-secret-fan/
 
* Snow Flower and the Secret Fan http://www.lisasee.com/snow-flower-and-the-secret-fan/
  
 
=== Measurement conversion ===
 
=== Measurement conversion ===
  
−
* Online Unit Conversion (converting modern units of measurement into measurement units no longer in general use)
+
* Online Unit Conversion http://www.onlineconversion.com/ (converting modern units of measurement into measurement units no longer in general use)
  
 
=== Underminers ===
 
=== Underminers ===
 
* Chapter Three – Who Are The Underminers? http://underminers.org/the-book/chapter-3/ (Propagating the message)
 
* Chapter Three – Who Are The Underminers? http://underminers.org/the-book/chapter-3/ (Propagating the message)
 +
* Chapter Nine – Recreating Community (Part 1) http://underminers.org/the-book/chapter-9/chapter-9-part-1/
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* Chapter Nine – Recreating Community (Part 2) http://underminers.org/the-book/chapter-9/chapter-9-part-2/
  
 
== Related ==
 
== Related ==
  
 
* [[Controlled folly]]
 
* [[Controlled folly]]
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== References ==
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[[Category:How_To]]

Latest revision as of 13:55, 9 October 2015

Let grammar, syntax, semantics, punctuation, and spelling into your life! Even the most energetic and wonderful mess has to be turned into sentences...

Virus.jpg

And, But and However

Do not start sentences with conjunctions such as And, But and However. According to English teachers everywhere, these should appear ONLY in the middle of a sentence, not shamefully whipped out at its beginning. That says no-thing about flaunting it as a title.

And, whenever someone says anything and you wish to add your 2 cents to the discussion, by all means, always start your sentence with "But ..." to make sure you wipe out everything anybody said before your "But ..." sentence entered the scene. "However ..." is a good alternative but not as effective as "But ..." at making others feel unheard (and therefore increasingly unwilling to listen to your additional information).

Once Upon A Time

It was the Best of Times, it was the Worst of Times, it was the Age of Wisdom, it was the Era of Foolishness, it was the Epoch of Belief, it was the Time of Incredulity, it was the Season of Light, it was the Aeon of Darkness, it was the Spring of Decolonisation, it was the Winter of Despair ... In short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its uproariest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the inflated degree of comparison only.

An important feature of a sentence is the reaction of the writer to some reality. In declarative sentences, this active part of the writer might be said to be manifesting a certain assertiveness.

A closer examination of assertive sentences shows an overwhelming majority to contain two basic content elements: a statement and an element about which a statement is made. The element about which something is stated may be said to be the basis of the utterance or the theme, and what is stated about the basis is the nucleus of the utterance or the theme. Old news, true. That a declarative sentence can be perceived to contain these two basic elements was recognised long ago.

However, less known is that these elements are given a different meaning in psychology. The theme is often called the psychological subject and the rheme the psychological predicate. And in a narration stream the order is usually simple: the theme of the next sentence usually being the rheme of the sentence before it. 

"Once upon a time there was a Queen. And the Queen had three daughters. The daughters ..."

"And the Queen had three daughters" has two parts: "the Queen" (basis) and "had three daughters" (nucleus).

But what is the situation at the beginning of a narration?

When we start to write about something which cannot yet be referred to as a known fact, then from the complex of notions included in the statement we anticipate one as given, as a notion that naturally presents itself and we make it the starting point.

It may be interesting to examine the beginnings of different narrations from this point of view, for further examination of our gut level processing.

Making Total Sense

Through the fathomless deeps of space swims the star turtle Great A’Tuin, bearing on its back the four giant elephants who carry on their shoulders the mass of the Discworld. A tiny sun and moon spin around them, on a complicated orbit to induce seasons, so probably nowhere else in the multiverse is it sometimes necessary for an elephant to cock a leg to allow the sun to go past ...

Choices

The underminers guide mentions the dangers of using words like progress and choice because they are often fake choices while re-inforcing disconnection predicates. Many words have been arrogated and appropriated by the machine. Words like sustainability, resilience and eco are all in use for greenwashing.

And just like the in the guide mentioned sharing real knowledge, there seem to be real choices: Do we now stop using these words altogether, or reinforce more connected predicates by using these words more congruently (depending on context and who we communicate with for what purpose)? That could be like take back the words?

Note: Make that singular, take back the word, and expect trolls believing religiously in the word (whatever the word is).

Predicates and implication by intonation

From Are Your Lights On?: How to Figure Out What the Problem Really is https://www.smashwords.com/extreader/read/53704/1/are-your-lights-on:

  • Mary had a little lamb
  • Mary had a little lamb
  • Mary had a little lamb
  • Mary had a little lamb
  • Mary had a little lamb

Where did words start?

Goodun. We have the written word, preceded by spoken word. And apparently the origin of spoken language has stumped linguistics. While some write things like "While it is widely understood that our ability to communicate through speech sets us apart from other animals, language experts, historians and scientists can only hypothesize how, where and when it all began. Some new findings may provide some real insight into this conundrum" [1], others not using the same definition of "language" and using more fluid perceptions might say that that is not "widely understood" but more a case of "widely hypothesised" [2] and that clearly, animal people, plant people and rock people also communicate [3][4][5], some even seem to "talk".

If someone asks the more fluid "when did the spoken words start?", these people might reply that spoken word started with communication by making sound waves [6]. If then someone asks when and where communication started, they might communicate they think it started with chemistry [7] and it appears just as true for humans [8][9].

And some when presented with that question, will not reply because they do not understand the question because they speak another language. Or they may reply (possibly asking "what?") and we may or may not understand the reply because we do not speak their language. We haven't built those "receptors" and "embedded structures" (yet).

Words account for only 5%? [10] Really?!? [11]

The last word

Some people seem to need to have it. Sometimes they are argumentative, but often they simply will not let a chat end for whatever reason. Enough is enough!

have the final/last word :

  1. to say the last statement in a discussion or argument: He can't bear to lose an argument. He always has to have the last word. That's why he's so annoyed with other people wanting to have the last word too.
  2. to make the final decision about something (usually + on ) Our bus driver has the final word on turning the wheel and pushing and pulling all kinds of levers and pedals in the bus. Do NOT interfere.

For expanding the universe of possible solutions, we need to understand the "for whatever reason". It can be:

  • know-it-all
  • dense
  • stubborn
  • intoxicated
  • always needing to be right
  • conversation hogging
  • excited
  • consensus-driven

In short, the last word has no value in itself. No need for battles. Or?

Looking for universality?

Try emotions.

Jump on the emo bandwagon!

Are emoji the same thing as emoticons?

Answer 1: For all intents and purposes, yes they are.

Answer 2: Emoticons (from “emotion” plus “icon”) are specifically intended to depict facial expression or body posture as a way of conveying emotion or attitude in e-mail and text messages. They originated as ASCII character combinations such as :-) to indicate a smile—and by extension, a joke—and :-( to indicate a frown. In East Asia, a number of more elaborate sequences have been developed, such as (")(-_-)(") showing an upset face with hands raised. Over time, many systems began replacing such sequences with images, and also began providing ways to input emoticon images directly, such as a menu or palette. The emoji sets used by Japanese cell phone carriers contain a large number of characters for emoticon images, along with many other non-emoticon emoji.

Don't get me started on dingbats.

To jump the bandwagon, first of all, keep calm and keep fiddling. Keep your towel close, and your IronyGuard at hand [12]. Then, jump the wagon.

Keep calm & Keep on fiddling
  • Too fast. Before jumping, you should have informed yourself properly with the documentary: http://www.dissolve.com/showreels/emoji After allowing four scripts I still wasn't able to see it. It seems to be riding that magic carpet in the cloud.
  • Inside information: If you wish to obfuscate your emoticon traffic, use hearts. Hearts are among the most used emoticons.
  • For unpredictable emoji traffic get the newest of the newest. The Unicode Consortium regularly releases new innovations in emoticons. Visit emojipedia for more on that: http://emojipedia.org/new/
  • Turn tracking on for (adjustments in) decision-making on your obfuscation/unpredictability ratio: http://www.emojitracker.com/ After allowing six! scripts I still get nothing.
  • Social media: The first one (http://emoj.li/) was already closed but, don't weep, Emojicate is available now for iOS devices (https://itunes.apple.com/en/app/emojicate-emoji-only-chat/id902547983). Simply switch device and your happiness is right around the corner again!
  • Do It Yourself: Turn your selfies, pets and favourite celebrities into emojis. The about page states "We believe in your freedom of expression". Download the app NOW from http://www.imojiapp.com/about

Read This!

(゜゜)～ employs the finite ~>゜)～～～ analysis method to (..) (._.) physical ( ..)φメモメモ φ(..)メモメモ of a =^_^=. The (V)o￥o(V) process consists of .....φ(・∀・＊) all systems into individual ((d[-_-]b)) or "＼(◎o◎)／" whose (-_-)zzz is easily //0-0\\ and then reconstructing the #-) from these o/\o. This is a O_o way of performing ┐('～`；)┌ and even in other（´∀｀）, such as ( ﾟヮﾟ). For example, ｷﾀﾜァ*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･゜(n‘∀‘)ηﾟ･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･* !!!!!

man rtfm

RTFM.jpg

For a recombination like this there is no need to make it convincing as a real man page, and the entertainment relies on making fun of overly reduced (context-less) statements and overly structured manual pages.

NAME

RTFM – tool to stimulate learning and improve workflow.

SYNOPSIS

RTFM is used to hit others with a lightning bolt.

DESCRIPTION

RTFM refers to the manual pages (or “man” pages, after the command used to display them) contained in *nix variants and has mutated to refer to reading any help pages or FAQs.

We lament over and over about how no one reads anymore, but we are also often just as guilty. Victims of our own hubris and overconfidence. In our own minds, we’re somehow annoyed by the very job we are doing. Help people solve problems. But sometimes it just touches the nerve, especially in situations where you’ve already explained how to fix it, and even more especially when you’ve already explained how to fix it to the same person.

It’s a slippery slope. Of course you always want to help, but at the same time, if you’re always there and available, it will lead to a condition where the user/junior admin will always skip figuring things out for themselves and just come straight to you.

There is no shame in reading. However, roughly 75% of IT is comprised of men. And it’s a pretty common perception that men don’t read (or ask for) directions.

noun vs verb

While the word “read” is a verb, the entire acronym is often used as a verb as well. Ex:

How do I set up pf to do ALTQ?

Dumbass, man it.

omg, *cry*

You’re lucky all I did was RTFM you.

  • Theo sets mode : +b *!n00b@*

A common alternative to RTFM is to stop using Linux and move out of your parents’ basement.

Some critics assert that frequent users of the term are simply expressing elitism against the newcomers, thus driving them away without providing any tips or helpful suggestions. This is especially true when RTFM is used without even specifying which manual their correspondent should be reading. In the absence of a manual, one may be advised to Lurk Moar, see lurkmoar(8)

FILES

In its normal application RTFM uses no files and is words spoken (or written) only. If applied via email may contain a link to the manual in the environment and the odd meme image. Such meme images are also in use on twitter ever since the update_with_media function was added to the twitter API. If applied on a forum, many users and files may be affected; see butthurt(8).

http://readthefuckingmanual.com/

http://www.pophangover.com/4641/the-official-internet-butthurt-complaint-form/

https://duckduckgo.com/?q=writing+effective+manuals

ENVIRONMENT VARIABLES

Manual

SEE ALSO

lurkmoar(8), butthurt(8), tldr(8)

BUGS

You may be required to look things up and be able to fix things your self eventually.

EXAMPLES

It’s 10:30AM. The black themed firefox browser is about to stare back as a ping announces an incoming message over jabber to our fearless gurl.

“Hey! Sorry to bother you, but how do I …”

Our fearless gurl’s eyes roll deep into the back of her eye sockets as she emits a loud, exasperated sigh. She knows it’s in the manual – she helped write it. But no one seems to read it. She feels her efforts have been wasted.

But today, our fearless gurl has a plan. Through the miracles of modern science and some quick searches online, she has found a secret formula that would merge her mind into anyone that emails or tweets or pokes over jabber to ask questions. They would be under her control and would instantly think to look for the answers themselves. All she needs is a bolt of lightning to complete the transformation … the surrounding environment is already crackling …

“RTFM !!!!!”, she said.

RESTRICTIONS

Authoritarians and exceptionalists considering themselves very important and too high up to ever having to lift a finger may take a dim view of overenthusiastic application of this tool.

AUTHOR

While overcoming the RTFM syndrome remains a mystery, this man page was assembled from various sources by anonymii. She disclaims responsibility for any actions inspired by this man page.

HISTORY

Although largely unsubstantiated, usage of RTFM may have begun as a military lingo during World War II, when the phrase “Read The Field Manual” became a staple expression among American soldiers in response to basic questions asked by new enlistees. First introduced in 1939, US Army Field Manuals instructed all the vital, necessary skills for a soldier, from how to fold your clothes properly to how to toss a grenade inside the enemy’s tank. By the early 1950s the phrase RTFM was in common use by radio and radar technicians in the US Armed Forces. Operators frequently did not check for simple faults before asking questions; for example, checking whether a power switch was on, a fuse had blown or a power cord had become disconnected. A common response would be, “Did you check the oh en oh ef ef switch (On/Off). RTFM appeared in print in 1979 on the Table of Contents page of the LINPACK Users’ Guide in the form “R.T.F.M.” — Anonymous, suggesting that it was already well established. Cleve Moler has since revealed that a visit to Argonne National Laboratory by Tektronix Software Manager Ned Thanhouser (grandson of Edwin Thanhouser) during the development of MATLAB led to the anonymous quote. The first Urban Dictionary entry for RTFM was submitted on November 13th, 2003, although its usage has been documented in Slashdot comments as early as in March 1999. Just yonder, Manual was struggling to make his way through the foxy forest behind Fucking’s place. Manual had severely hurt his love handle during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral Manuals suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the The. One by one they latched on to Manual. Already weakened from his injury, Manual yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Manuals running off with his The. But then God came down with His charismatic smile and restored Manual’s The. Feeling pleased, God smote the Manuals for their injustice. Then He got in His best-in-its-so-called-‘class’ sedan and jetted away with the fortitude of half a million man-eating capybaras running from a oversized pack of 3-legged wallabies. Manual danced with joy when he saw this. His The was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in four minutes his favorite TV show, Fucking, was going to come on (followed immediately by ‘When 3-legged wallabies meet hand grenade’). Manual was excited. And so, everyone except Fucking and a few rusty razor blade-toting long-haired sea monkeys lived blissfully happy, forever after.

ANTITHESIS

The antithesis of RTFM is TL;DR which stands for “too long; didn’t read.”, see tldr(8)

If some asshole presents to you a long text and you still need to read it, you can incrementally read it with SuperMemo. What this entails is you mince and flashcardize the shit out of the text until it gets obliterated and you can’t recognize it. It’s like throwing the piece of e-paper in acid. The TL;DR is no moar.

FUTURE DIRECTIONS

None or a new type of hominids in around 5 million years (or sooner by self-destruction).

SEE ALSO

STFW (“Search The Fucking Web”), GIYF (“Google Is Your Friend”), LMGTFY (“Let Me Google That For You”), RTBM (“Read The Bloody Manual”—In some countries, e.g., the UK and Australia, this is a fractionally more polite alternative with identical meaning), RTFA (“Read The Fucking/Featured Article”—common on news forums such as Fark.com and Slashdot, where using “TFA” instead of “the article” has become a meme). Also see palindrome and underminers resources below.

Creating a fake press release

For press releases the entertainment relies on it (at least initially) being accepted as a civilised press release by receivers, IOW in how convincing it looks at first glance. Study a few local real press releases.

Anatomy of a press release

Keep it to one page (400-600 words):

  • Logo: Often found on releases distributed via mail, e-mail or a newswire service. Otherwise, omit.
  • Headline: Usually designed to be short and grab attention.
  • Subheader: Not always present. A descriptive expansion on the headline.
  • Place line: Identifies where the story is coming from.
  • Date line: Date of the release.
  • Lead paragraph: Often includes who, what, when, where, why. Can include url's.
  • Body: Typically 3 to 5 paragraphs, most important information first, making it a so-called inverted pyramid.
  • Boilerplate: Organisational who and what.
  • Contact information: Newswire requirement.
  • End mark: ### or -end- (newswire)

Sperm are Dying! Females to Outnumber Males!

Amsterdam, 26 august 2015, GP

Undermining the Machine part 2 http://underminers.org/the-book/chapter-7/chapter-7-part-2/, may be freely reproduced but not altered

We may already be seeing the initial impact on men of rising temperatures and if this rise continues, sperm may fail completely. Will there be only females walking around on this planet? Does this spell the end of humans?

The seemingly most likely explanation for scrotal descent, and one that has been around for some time, is that sperm production and storage are maximised at typically 2.5 to 3 oC below the average healthy human body temperature of 37 oC. Supporting phenomena to that theory are skin of the scrotal sac being thin (promoting heat dissipation), and arteries supplying blood to the scrotum being located next to the veins that are taking blood away from it (one can easily recognise a cooling/heating exchange mechanism happening right there). Plus that spermatogenesis is most efficient at 34 oC. If sperm were kept at normal body temperature, sperm production would fail completely.

As temperatures rise (sperm with a Y survives three days, with an X five days, and higher temperatures slow down sperm) women may birth more girls than boys. If this were true, one would expect slightly more women conceived in tropical regions than at the poles (in historical records). This indeed appears to be the case [13]. In Japan, rising temperatures are reported to have lead to a higher proportion of girls being born than boys, suggesting that climate change could indeed alter the mix of men and women [14].

With the current rise in temperature we'd also expect to see a decline of male populations in other species. This too has been found. Male turtle populations are apparently already crashing in the heat [15].

Male turtles may be saved by female turtles digging deeper (hence cooler) birth pits on beaches, but with a direct threat to human balls, the chances of survival of just about every species on this planet went up as the powers-that-claim-to-be, as mired in self-interest as they are [16], may take causes of rising temperatures more seriously as a threat to respond to with impeccable interdependent non-delusional energy dancing [17][18][19], than as an opportunity for cap-and-trade on CO2 (or shifted to other types of) emissions ("regulating" farting) and continuing Business As Usual [20][21], because their own gonads may be next.

About GenderSec Press: GenderSec Press is a one-time only but really non-existent organisation, called into being for making this press release look fake.

Smarter Cities

Resources

Senses

Making total sense

Changing perceptions

Sound waves

Inflationary language

Palindromes

Other times

Language creation

Language examples

Measurement conversion

Underminers

Related

References

  1. ↑ Where and when did language begin? A remarkable new study may have the answer http://blog.dictionary.com/origin/
  2. ↑ Which language is the oldest? http://www.languagesoftheworld.info/historical-linguistics/which-language-is-the-oldest.html
  3. ↑ Ainimal communication https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animal_communication
  4. ↑ Plants talk to each other using an internet of fungus http://www.bbc.com/earth/story/20141111-plants-have-a-hidden-internet and https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20827864.600-fungal-threads-are-the-internet-of-the-plant-world/
  5. ↑ Mycorrhiza-Induced Resistance and Priming of Plant Defenses http://www.researchgate.net/publication/225059105_Mycorrhiza-Induced_Resistance_and_Priming_of_Plant_Defenses
  6. ↑ Can any animals talk and use language like humans http://www.bbc.com/earth/story/20150216-can-any-animals-talk-like-humans
  7. ↑ Animal Behavior: Signaling and Communication http://www.sparknotes.com/biology/animalbehavior/signalingandcommunication/section2.rhtml
  8. ↑ Neurobiology of Chemical Communication Chapter 19 Human Pheromones http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK200980/
  9. ↑ Chemical communication and mother-infant recognition http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2717541/
  10. ↑ Communication: 80% Body Language; 15% Tone & 5% Actual Words http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021960187
  11. ↑ Is Nonverbal Communication a Numbers Game? Is body language really over 90% of how we communicate? https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/beyond-words/201109/is-nonverbal-communication-numbers-game
  12. ↑ IRONYGuard - Removes All The Painful Irony In Your News https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BFPdnIwP-kw
  13. ↑ Hot male: can sex in humans be modified by temperature? http://aerg.canberra.edu.au/library/sex_general/2003_McLachlan_Storey_TSD_in_humans.pdf
  14. ↑ Climate change is associated with male:female ratios of fetal deaths and newborn infants in Japan http://www.fertstert.org/article/S0015-0282%2814%2901840-8/abstract
  15. ↑ Male turtle populations crashing in the heat https://www.newscientist.com/article/dn11227-male-turtle-populations-crashing-in-the-heat/
  16. ↑ How the rich are destroying the earth http://makewealthhistory.org/2009/06/02/how-the-rich-are-destroying-the-earth-by-herve-kempf/
  17. ↑ ZooKeys biodiversity research http://zookeys.pensoft.net/browse_articles (beautiful pictures of newly discovered species)
  18. ↑ So you say you don't want a revolution? http://cluborlov.blogspot.nl/2015/07/so-you-say-you-dont-want-revolution.html (with some great comments too!)
  19. ↑ The Logic of Nonviolent Revolutions http://privatewww.essex.ac.uk/~ksg/nvd2012/Dahletal.pdf
  20. ↑ Can Christiana Figueres persuade humanity to save itself? http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2015/08/24/the-weight-of-the-world (most likely not, as the attempt seems to assume economic growth & emissions can be uncoupled)
  21. ↑ Fossil Fuel Execs Made Twice As Much As U.S. Pledged To Help Fight Climate Change Overseas http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/fossil-fuel-execs-climate-change_55e62913e4b0b7a9633ac41a
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